I used to think that finding the right one was about the man having a list of certain qualities. If he has them, we’d be compatible and happy. Sort of a checkmark system that was a complete failure. But I found out that a healthy relationship isn’t so much about sense of humor or intelligence or attractive. It’s about avoiding partners with harmful traits and personality types. And then it’s about being with a good person. A good person on his own, and a good person with you. Where the space between you feels uncomplicated and happy. A good relationship is where things just work. They work because, whatever the list of qualities, whatever the reason, you happen to be really, really good together.
Berhentilah merasa hampa. Berhentilah minta tolong untuk dilengkapi. Berhentilah berteriak-teriak ke sesuatu di luar sana. Berhentilah bersikap seperti ikan di dalam kolam yang malah mencari-cari air. Tidak ada seorang pun mampu melengkapi apa yang sudah utuh.
Here are the top 10 (but not limited, and in no chronological order) reasons why my boyfriend rules:
1) He puts up with my emotional hurryhah-ness
Just last night, I was feeling wide awake even though it was already past midnight and my brain has been yelling “go sleep, woman!” for my own good. But I couldn’t seem to fall into sleep. Even though he was busy at work, he still made time to reply to my non-important messages and entertained me on the phone until it was over 3 in the morning when I finally started feeling sleepy. He even had to eat his supper while talking to me because I was just being so damn high-maintenance. Seriously, I wouldn’t even date me. He’s really a star and I love him for putting up with all my highs and lows.
2) He makes the best love poem
On our first month anniversary, he wrote me a poem. (Actually, he insisted that the poem wasn’t done yet but I kinda forced him to give it to me. But psst. Let’s just pretend he gave it to me willingly.) It was a simple poem, written in his unruly handwritings (which I love. I love people’s handwritings, and especially his. I could be biased. Totally.) It wasn’t Shakespeare’s masterpiece, but it was the sweetest thing he could have given me at the time. I hold it dearly and it still makes me grin the widest and toothiest grin whenever I see it.
3) His constant reassuring ways to let me know that he loves me
I get jealous. I get insecure. Some other guys probably don’t have the patience to entertain their girlfriends whenever this happens. A friend of mine once shared with me that her boyfriend would just say “don’t be ridiculous” and leave it at that when she admitted of being jealous about something. My boyfriend is the most awesome, loving guy who has never failed to reassure me that I have nothing to be jealous about. He does it so perfectly that I can do nothing but believe him. Just thinking about it makes me want to run up to him and give him a super big hug right now.
4) He has just the right amount of dorkiness that complement mine perfectly
I’m a dork, and this has been pointed out by people a lot of times before. Sometimes I do ridiculous and embarrassing things just to amuse myself, like dancing around the house, or pretending to speak with an accent. But with my boyfriend, it’s not just that he understands and gets me perfectly down to my dorkiest cell, he’s also the dorkiest, most adorable person I have ever met. When everyone would just look at me and laugh whenever I did something silly, my boyfriend would crack me up by doing something even more embarrassing or taking part in the said-silly thing with me.
5) His love for movies, songs, places, pepper lunch and banana honey prata with ice cream
I could not imagine being with someone who doesn’t enjoy going to the movies, or seeing new places while traveling, or sharing my big appetite for food, and all of these things – my boyfriend is the perfect companion. We go to the movies a few times a week and we love planning for travel schemes and sharing new things together, and hey! Who would’ve known, he shares my love for crabs, pepper lunch and banana honey prata with ice cream too! Seriously, is there anything else I could ask for? He rocks.
6) His unapologetic passion for things he loves
I love people with great passion. I think it shows individuality and uniqueness as a person, and I find it really attractive. I love that my boyfriend is addicted to Transformers, I love that he knows all Manchester United players and stats at the back of his hand, and I love that during our recent visit to Dinosaurs Exhibition, he could point out all the Dino facts they got wrong and corrected them. I love that he’s unapologetic about them, and I love it even more that even though we don’t necessarily share the same passion, we find ways to always respect each other’s.
7) His patience for tolerating my cheesiness, mushiness and manjaness
I have a cheesy streak the size of a bull. And when these things hit, he patiently listens, entertains, or try to out-cheeses me, always makes me smile. He never belittles my feelings, or makes fun of these perfectly mock-able traits of mine. Instead, all of the time he hugs me and tells me that he *enter the cheesiest verb you can think of* too.
8) He has the most awesome laugh
I think we all agree that laughter is the best medicine. We can’t take life too seriously and it’s easy when your boyfriend has the most awesome laugh. Mine laughs without inhibitions, loud and infectious. His laughter is the loudest in the room, and I can’t help but laugh along, ruffling his hair playfully because he’s just so adorable.
9) His listening ear
I’m pretty convinced he must have a magic ear for always being ready to listen to my ramblings and stories (which I’m sure he’s not even remotely interested in half of the time). But he never fails to be there for me. Always. Sometimes I take this for granted, but whenever I think about it, I’m so very grateful for his constant willingness to lend me a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, or any of his other body parts for my emotional well-being.
10) He’s a writer
A great one at that. I’ve always had a thing for writers. I wish there are some better explanations for this, but I just think writers are really sexy. I love seeing his writings, a part of me cheers along whenever I see his name on the paper, and I can’t be prouder that he’s mine. (audience cue: “aaaawwww.”)
11) He reads my mind and completes my sentences
Is he secretly a Jedi? *wishful*
Okay, that was 11. Ooops.
See? I told you I have the best boyfriend in whole world.